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Using Feng Shui To Find A Love Mate

Using Feng Shui To Find A Love Mate

Send a Clear Message: Our environments have messages that reflect our internal state. The interpretation of environmental symbols is one of my favorite topics.  Everything in your environment “speaks” to you, reflecting what is going on inside you and those with whom you live.  This energetic message is picked up by your subconscious as you and others spend time in that environment, reinforcing the message.  Over the years, I have found hundreds of amazing correlations between what is happening in people’s lives and what I see in their homes.

One consultation story that illustrates my point comes to mind as I’m writing this.  A few years ago I met with a woman I’ll call Jennifer, whose husband had died over a dozen years prior.  She wanted to share her life with someone new in the way she had with her husband many years ago.  She told me she had been ready for years, but nothing had manifested.  She was hoping that I could help her use feng shui to open up her space to find a serious relationship.

As I was assessing her home, I noticed that the way she set up her surroundings was incongruent with what she said she wanted in her life.  In fact, it was completely the opposite.

I noticed that everything in her home was “single.”  In her bedroom she had one lamp, one pillow, one end table, and, on the wall were three images depicting a woman alone.  In one of images, the woman was sleeping alone, in another, she was lounging alone, and, in the final image, she was eating alone.  These were “happy” alone images; in other words, not lonely looking.

In her living room was a large painting of a woman tending to her garden – peaceful and alone.  Her TV room had only one cozy recliner, and even her dining room table, where she ate her meals, had only one chair.  The other chairs were taken away from the table and placed in other rooms of the house.

Following that theme, anything in “pairs” was split up and its matching half was found somewhere else in the home, including matching figurines and images of males and females.  Even the salt and pepper shakers were split up – the salt near the stove and the pepper on the dining table.

Since everything about her home screamed “single,” and because I know the environment is an external manifestation of everything going on within, I wanted to make sure she truly wanted to find a new mate.  When people truly want something, the environment begins to shift naturally to reflect that new desire.  Although she told me she wanted a new mate in her life, I saw nothing to even remotely support this statement.

I find that often when people say they want something that does not manifest for them, they are subconsciously resisting it.  Why?  Because they either do not want to leave their comfort zone or they gain some benefit by staying in their current situation.  Ultimately, if what you want is not in alignment with how you feel subconsciously, no matter what you do with the environment, it will never manifest.

I decided to talk to Jennifer a little bit more, and we uncovered that she was quite happy living a single life, but a few years ago she got the idea that she “should” start getting serious about finding someone.  After our conversation, she realized that the reality of having a serious relationship would mean that she would have to dramatically shift her lifestyle focus from “me” to “us.”  Deep down she really did not want that.  She didn’t want to give up a lot of the things she cherished, such as doing what she wanted when she wanted and not having to be accountable to anyone else.

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Together we came to the conclusion that what she really wanted was companionship, someone with whom to share common interests from time to time.  She loved living in her home by herself and really was not ready to share it with anyone else.

Instead of suggesting that she change her bedroom (an intimate room) to reflect the “pair” energy, bringing in another pillow, another end table, and changing her paintings to show love and partnership, I suggested she put her focus on the common areas of her home (social rooms). In this way, she could open up the energy to congruently and authentically depict what she really wanted.

Carefully look around your home and ask yourself what it is saying.  Is the energetic message congruent with how you feel?  Do you need to change some things to match your heartfelt desires?  If so, now is an excellent time to start.

Alice Inoue is a life guide that uses the modalities of feng shui, astrology and spirituality in her work. Her offerings include award-winning, mind-body-spirit themed books, as well as a series of feng shui instructional DVD’s.  Images via ©

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